My hair is not better than your hair

No it is not.

Big hair don’t care, my hair combed out using coconut and Shea Butter
Big hair don’t in a Bun…











Hi Curly Naturals,

I intentionally started this post with pictures of my comb out (basically my hair completely combed out and definition free) to try and get my message across. There have been times where other naturals have approached me and touched my hair out of definition and style (and I never know how to tell them that is not correct curly etiquette) to ask me “How do you get your hair like that and by that they mean the curly definition that I get from my Dr Miracles Soft hold Creme when I do my Wash and Go with my LOC Method. When I get asked this I get sad for a few reasons:

  • because most SA Curly Girls do not have access to the right information about their hair.
  • They don’t know where to buy (hair) products
  • they don’t know the different techniques to manipulate their hair
  • they have not accepted their hair.

I then have to explain curl patterns to them and how our curl patterns differ. The natural community in South Africa is small (although it is growing) but not many SA Curly girls know where to find info or products for curly hair.

There is this thing in the Natural community called Curlcism (basically Curl racism) where one curl pattern is deemed more desired than another. Unfortunately I have to agree with this, I see so many girls with type 4 hair wanting to manipulate their hair so that it looks like 3C corkscrew curls.

After 22 years I only accepted my hair and my wish is for every curly girl accepts their hair and how they manage and style their hair. I now look at hair so much differently than what I did pre-big chop. I see the lovely potential of kinky hair and the voluptuous afros they can be, I see the gorgeousย ringlets inย  3B and 3C hair. I love the poofiness of natural, the Bantu knots 2 and 3 strand twists, the flat twists, flexi rods, roller sets,perm sets, coils and straw sets. I love how consistently unpredictable our hair can be, that we set aside days to wash our hair and try out new styles or techniques, not to mention the time we have spent You tube researching techniques. We struggle to find products that work for us (holy grail products anyone?), the right technique and regime(n). We still struggle with frizz, bad hair days and we have to succumb to protective styling for the greater good of our curls. We have words like pre-poo(you said what?!) co-wash ( is that like co-parenting) and lets not forget the abbreviations; BAA,EVOO & TWA.

I love the it when people (none curlies) ask me “How do you get your hair like that?” and look in awe at my curliness in all its glory.

My hair is not better than yours, learn to accept your hair and work with it it instead of against it and you will see it flourish and grow. And remember once you go natural you become part of a community that loves and accept themselves and slay it with their hair.

We are curly,kinky,coily,wavy and ziggly. We will grow, we will flourish and we are here to stay.

#CurliesUnite #StereotypesMustFall

ND ๐Ÿ˜‰



11 thoughts on “My hair is not better than your hair

  1. I love dr miracle ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ Truly a God send for loc methods especially with the limited options we have in SA ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€ I’ve found that Kair has really upgraded their conditioner in the purple bottle it works so well ๐Ÿ˜„

    1. Hi Curly Sean,

      I agree, it really is god sent.
      I have checked out Kair before (because I buy from Clicks often) and they do have some products that us curlies can use as well.
      I like their spray on leave in conditioner.

    1. Jeppesqueen,

      Firstly welcome to the natrual community,if you are on Facebook be sure to check out SA Curly Girl’s page.
      Secondly Congratulations on making the big step, be warned that this will not be an easy journey but it’s well wortth the piece of mind you get.
      Thirdly I hope that my blog continuos to inspire you and and provide you with the help you need, feel free to ask if you need advice.


  2. All I can say is YASSSSSS!!!!!

    A year later and it’s still relevant. More females need to accept their hair whether type 3 or 4.

    Thanks for the post.

    1. You are welcome Tayane.
      The motivation for the post was out of pure frustration. It took me 22 years to accept my hair and have self love I’m not about to tell a fellow natural to manipulate their hair just for her to hate herself. No ma’am

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